Where. To. Start. I guess a whole freaking lot has happened so I better just pick something general to write about or we will be here for hours and you will think I am a ranting and raving crazy person by the end of it. Do you like how I say this as if you didn't already have that impression? LOL
Summer was great, I rocked the beach in a bikini (or bikinis as the case may be) for the majority of it since we had crazy heat waves and went on a 10 day holiday to the Okanagan in August. And can I just say, it felt fantastic. And I mean fanfuckingtastic! Seriously. I never once felt uncomfortable, not even around the skinny childless bitches whose bodies haven't seen a stretch mark or piece of cottage cheesy cellulite yet. It was, for lack of a better word, awesome. I have truly never felt better about myself.
The healing process itself is coming along nicely. I am still rebuilding my core strength (yes, still!) so that has been the biggest hurdle for me in all of this. Ok, maybe not the biggest hurdle. I just finished reading my entire blog as a reminder of what I went through and let me just say...OMFG I can't believe it! I had *almost* forgotten what the pain was like (you know how the mind tends to block out traumatic experiences? yeah, like that) but the hunchback walking, sleepless nights, tears of pain and regret, gut busting constipation, girdle wearing, and general gore quickly came flooding back once I started reading. Ok, I'm not going to that dark place, back to healing. The core strength issue has been the loooongest part of the process. I was doing P90X Ab RipperX last night and I can barely bang out 15 of the 25 reps of each exercise and I am a wheezing, panting, sweaty, flat on the floor MESS literally yelling "what the hell?!" by the end of it. And for those of you not familiar with it, it's only 15 mins long, albeit super intense. lol. But, I am hoping to be sporting a six pack this summer, or at very least a 2 pack dammit! This could be wishful thinking (or just plain delusional) on my part, but a girl can dream can't she?
As for my incision, the scar is still pretty ugly, although nowhere near as bad as it was last I posted. It is more pinkish than red, but as my surgeon keeps reminding me, this can take up to 2 YEARS to fade so we're hardly there yet. It is fairly flat now, more flush with the skin, which is good. The belly button scar is sort of brownish in color. And...drumroll please...I got it pierced 2 weeks ago! This is something I had wanted to do for years, but who in their right mind would pierce the wrinkled prune of skin that was my previous bb? There was some concern about piercing a surgically created belly button, but my piercer had prior experience with it and in his exact words upon examining me were "pardon my language, but your belly button is fucking perfect for piercing", so there you have it. It hardly hurt at all, possibly because it is still semi-numb since the surgery which was a good thing in this case. It started to scab up a few days ago and I was in a panic and went flying down to his shop to see him and he said it was all a normal part of healing. Thank god, can you imagine messing with a navel that cost $6,000+ to attain? That would be "add valium to your cereal" stressful, to say the least.
Side note: I'm starting to rethink this blogging idea tonight, as I'm not entirely 'with it' after the week I have had and my boys are behaving like hooligans behind me right now. I'm not sure a couch cushion to the head is helping my creative writing skills much. I could stop now and try again but I probably won't have/make the time this weekend to finish so bear with me. So I guess what I'm saying is that if I'm not as witty as usual, I'm putting the blame onto everyone else...
As promised as the reason behind why I got the TT when I did, I have returned back to work. I'm not full time, but 4-6hrs a day 5 days a week is plenty when you have 4 kids and a husband (read: 5 kids) so I'm pretty happy with it. Although as mentioned above, this week was a complete gong show and I actually came home from work and whacked back some Ativan on Wednesday. But that's a whole other blog post for another day. Quite possibly on a different blog site, one where profanity and threats of violence are not against the rules :P
I know many of you are going to want pictures inserted here, so I'm just going to be honest about why I'm not posting any today. Mother Nature reared her ugly red head this morning and I feel like a giant bloated cow, plus my piercing is still a bit scabby. I absolutely super duper pinky swear promise to post one next week though. Even if I don't have time to blog, I'll post a picture to go with this entry. Deal? Actually, come to think of it I do have some bikini pics from late summer I could post for the time being. Many of you who are my 3 dimensional friends will have seen them. Look again. Or, don't. Whatev.
I guess, all in all, I believe that there is a happy ending to my story. Any minor hiccups along the way were just that and I can say with a billion percent certainty that all the pain and torture (both emotional and physical) and pure, utter Hell I went through is finally worth it. I can recall a blog post early on in my recovery where I was (not so patiently) waiting for the day to come. I'm thrilled to say...it has arrived.
